Spiritual Growth

Sep
16

Humbling Week

Every now and then it feels like everything I touch falls apart. I'm sure some of these things are all in my head, but some of them are real life disasters (or at least mini-disasters).

A couple days ago when I was pulling our mini-van into the garage, I scraped up against the lawnmower. When I say "scraped", I mean the metal-to-metal kind of SCRAPE. Then, in order to get away from the mean lawnmower, I brilliantly decided to back up so I could pull the van over a bit. Did I mention there was a scraping sound when I pulled into the garage? Um.....same sound when I pulled out.

It didn't make me feel any better when my sweet husband just shrugged his shoulders and said not to worry about it. I wish that were possible. As long as we have that van (which will probably be a long time, since no one will want to buy a used van with two big scratches on the front of it!), I will have a little reminder of my mistake.

I do not enjoy times like these. On top of that, I feel like I have a weight on my shoulders from being horribly behind in this week's homeschool lessons, and a knot has been deposited in my stomach today because of a little laundry "incident" (don't ask).

I know that God uses these times to discipline and instruct my prideful heart. He reminds me that I'm broken. I'm flawed. I make mistakes. Lots of them. Unfortunately, humility is never an easy or enjoyable lesson for me to learn. As a matter of fact, an assault on my pride often leaves me feeling sick inside.

Right now I am learning about who I am. I'm also learning about who God is. Most of the time I think I'm better than I am, while He is better than I think He is.

So much to learn....so much growing to do....so much in need of God's grace.

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Recently, I've been sleeping in. I haven't been sleeping too awfully late, just later than I should. Later than I can afford to if I hope to have a quiet time that's quiet. And, since it's summer, I always figure that I'll find some time later in the day to open my Bible.

What is it about the word later that sounds so much softer, so much more forgiving than other words? The word later feels like it contains some sort of promise. It seems to say that I will eventually get to whatever task I'm putting off right now. It's so much sweeter than words like procrastination, selfishness, priorities.

Unfortunately, that word is often a liar. My later usually turns into never or tomorrow. And, yet, I still say it. I still believe it. I still think that I'll actually take time out of my busy day to ignore the beeping dryer or sticky dishes and escape to my room with the Word. Not impossible....but not likely.

So this week I've been setting my alarm to help me get up in the mornings. I never enjoy setting the alarm, anticipating its interruption, or prying open my sleepy eyes. But I do enjoy beginning my day with the Lord. So I set, anticipate, and pry.

One thing that's helped me stay focused on those tired mornings is to write out scripture. I must take after my Dad. He had notebooks full of passages he had written out in his uncommonly beautiful handwriting. Sometimes he would add personal notes or commentary. Other times he would simply copy the Word he loved so much.

For whatever reason, the act of writing helps my brain sit up and pay attention. I think about the words in a different way. They almost seem to wash over me. I remember them better. I don't fall asleep. It's hard to sleep when you're writing.

Years from now, I hope to look back at the passages I've copied and see what Words God has used to encourage my heart. There is something very special, very personal, about looking at the verses my dad wrote out. It's almost like being privy to a personal conversation between him and his Savior. Maybe one day my children will look at my not-so-beautiful handwritten notebooks to listen in on my personal conversations.

What do you do during your quiet times with the Lord? How do you stay focused? Please share in the comments!

Actually, I've been back for this entire week, but I've been busy. Crazy busy. What is it about vacations that make me feel like I need a....well....a vacation?

There's just so much that needs done around here. We spent a good deal of time working on our patio and landscape during the staycation part of this week, but the inside of the house looks like it could use its own vacation. Like my husband put it, there are layers of things we need to do: general cleaning, sorting and organizing, decorating and improving. The list never ends.

So what did I accomplish on this first day back to real life? I helped my girlie bake dozens and dozens of cookies to sell at tomorrow's neighborhood garage sale, and I spent several hours taking my mom to an appointment. That's pretty much all I had time to do.

Now, before you go thinking any warm and fuzzy thoughts about my selflessness today, let me burst that bubble. You see, I didn't choose my day. These are the tasks God placed in front of me, and I'm afraid I didn't always handle the trials of the day in a God-glorifying way. Those pesky sin issues!

One thing God used to challenge and convict my heart this morning (and throughout the day) was an article entitled"Motherhood as a Mission Field". It was written by one of the godly women from Femina. God knew exactly what my sinful heart needed (thanks to Girltalk for posting the link).

I was losing lost sight of why I do what I do. I took my eyes off the cross and only saw my inadequacies. I've been looking at the piles of stuff that needs organized (or sold at the garage sale!), the children who always make messes and want something from me, and the schedule that just won't slow down. I've seen my own failures around every cobweb-filled corner and behind each unwashed stack of dishes.

I've forgotten that things like baking cookies and picking up dirty socks are my mission, my ministry. I've forgotten it for the past few weeks. I've forgotten it several times today.

Praise God for His grace that reaches down to where I am, right in the middle of motherhood and homemaking. It's not a glamorous life, but it's my life. It's my ministry. And, hopefully, God will keep pounding that truth into my hard head and my sinful heart day after day. I'm sure I'll need it!


Preparing for my Quiet Time is a pretty simple affair. I fix a glass of water, grab a few items from the bookshelf, and settle down at the table. I’ve found that while I don’t need a lot of gadgets around me, it helps to have a few simple tools to aid me in my study.

-A notebook. This could be a leather bound journal, a hardcover book with a verse scrolled on each page, or a simple ten-cent spiral notebook. I usually use the cheap spiral notebook. It doesn’t really matter what I use, so long as I actually use it. I copy down verses from scripture, quotes from books I read, and personal thoughts on what I’m learning. It can also be a great place to keep track of prayer requests. The act of writing notes down helps me to think a little deeper and gives me a record to look at later.

-A colored pencil. I like to write in books. There. I said it. Some people cringe at the thought of marking up their Bible or the books they’re reading, but I like it. It’s nice to be able to grab a favorite book and browse through the passages that stood out to me the first time around. Also, since I’m actively searching for things that are especially meaningful or that I’ll want to read later, it helps me to stay focused. I also write in my Bible. I usually use a red pencil for writing in books and a blue pen for marking in my Bible. Just personal preference. There is something very comforting about opening to a page in my Bible and having an underlined verse jump out at me (especially if it’s a verse I’ve been searching for but couldn’t remember the reference!).

-Index cards. I will often copy Bible verses or passages from books onto index cards to have out during the day. Just having them on the table in front of me is a reminder of where my heart and mind should be. And, since I can’t usually remember what happened five minutes ago, they bring to mind what I was reading several hours earlier. The act of writing something down pushes it a little further into my brain, and reading it throughout the day helps keep it there.

Finally, a key to using the right tools is having them available when you need them (as anyone who has spent half an hour searching for a screwdriver knows). I have a large bookshelf where my Bible, notebooks, and pens are kept. I’ve seen others use a basket beside their favorite chair. Take a minute to consider where you enjoy spending your Quiet Time and what you can use as a “tool box” so that you can use your time searching the scriptures instead of searching for a pen!

Photo credit: tribalslamdance

As I'm getting back into my Quiet Time routine, I'm really enjoying reading a good book. But another great way be productive during my early morning time with God is to simply dive into scripture......over, and over, and over again.

A few years ago, I heard a godly man at my church talk about choosing a book from the Bible to read in its entirety every day for a month. That next week I chose the book of Colossians and began my month-long reading. I was amazed at the things that jumped out at me each day. I would usually take the time to read the notes from my study Bible, underline particular passages, and write some verses in my journal. God used this book to convict my heart and draw me closer to Himself in a way I never could have imagined.

I've usually picked a shorter book from the New Testament for a month of reading. But you could also do this with a longer book that you break into smaller sections. You might be amazed at how quickly you can read through four to six chapters, leaving you plenty of time for prayer and for digging a little deeper into study notes or related passages. It can seem a little overwhelming for the first couple of days, but stick with it. The more familiar you become with the themes and verses, the easier it gets.

But doesn't it get "boring" to read the same thing every day? Nope. As a matter of fact, I missed reading it when the month was over, and when my pastor decided to preach through the book a couple of months later, I was able to glean so much more from his teachings because I was already very familiar with the passages.

So, what's stopping you? Pray. Think about it. Then set that alarm and dive into the Bible tomorrow morning. You'll be glad you did!

The alarm goes off. I roll out of bed. It's cold, and I'm tired. I go to the table and stare at my Bible and notebook as I lift up a prayer (being careful not to close my eyes so I don't dose off) I want to hear God speak to me. Silence. I know that I need God's Word, but I'm not exactly sure where to start. I would love it if a heavenly light would shine down on the perfect passage that the Lord wants me to ponder today. Nothing. I'm tempted to flip to a few random favorites, but I know I need more than just a quick "shot in the arm". I need some focus, and if I'm not careful, a couple days like this one will leave me wondering if this early morning Quiet Time is really worth it.

Maybe you can relate to the struggle I often face when I'm trying to establish a Quiet Time routine. I don't want it to be a waste of time, and I don't want to act like it's some "magic pill" that I should take so that God will bless my day. God's grace is not dependent upon what time I get up in the morning. I want to be intentional, but I can easily feel a little.....lost.

I've found that reading a book durning my time with God can be just the thing I need, especially if I'm jumping back into a regular Quiet Time. First, having a book to look forward to helps get my feet onto the floor. Knowing that I'm going to have my heart challenged and encouraged pulls me out of bed. Also, until I'm used to the earlier waking time, I can use something to keep my attention focused so I don't fall asleep. If I'm not careful, I'll start thinking about what I'm going to pack in lunches that day and end up in Dreamland. Sad, but true.

But not all books are created equal, and not every "good" book is worthy of Quiet Time status. I am very careful to choose books that:

-Point me to Christ and biblical principles. I'm not looking for something to be a substitute for Bible reading. I want something that will enhance my Bible reading. I'll often look up the scripture references used in the book in my own Bible so I can take notice of context, read the study notes, and underline verses I want to be able to easily find again.

-Challenge my heart. It isn't enough to have a self-help book, even a Christian one, that will simply make me feel a little better about myself. Growth is the goal, and conviction is usually a necessary ingredient.

-Are written by a trusted author. Please, do NOT walk into a Christian bookstore and choose any 'ol book off the shelf. Know who you're reading. Some of my favorite authors are Carolyn Mahaney, CJ Mahaney, Ginger Plowman, Jerry Bridges, Elisabeth Elliot, John Piper, John MacArthur, Ted Tripp, and Paul David Trip.

Here's some truly good books to get you started:

Feminine Appeal by Carolyn Mahaney. This is the book I'm currently reading during my Quiet Time. Even though I've already been through it several times, I always learn something new and am reminded of timeless biblical truths. It contains lessons from Titus chapter two on being a godly woman.

 

 

Heaven at Home by Ginger Plowman. This book is full of humor and a healthy dose of humility and grace. All of her books are great, but this one really challenged my thinking on how I view my home and my role in it. The last couple of sentences sum up the focus of the book, "...a peaceful home is measured by the extent to which Christ reigns. In other words, the less there is of us and the more there is of Christ, the more heavenly home will be."

 

 

Disciplines of Grace by Jerry Bridges. This book changed the way I viewed God and His act of grace more than any other book I've read. As a matter of fact, I don't think I understood an ounce of what the grace of God was about until I read this book (although I still struggle with the concept!). Bridges says, "Your worst days are never so bad that you are beyond the reach of God's grace. And your best days are never so good that you are beyond the need of God's grace." Maybe I'll pull Disciplines of Grace out next. I need lots of growth in this subject!

 

Photo credit: tribalslamdance