I've had a rough couple of weeks. That happens to me sometimes. I wish it didn't, but it does. And it stinks.
I've spent way too much time over the past few days crying buckets of tears for no good reason. Well, I thought I had good reasons at the time, but I can't seem to remember them right now.
I really hated the thought of airing my dirty laundry here (oh, I just remembered one of my good reasons: dirty laundry), but I have a feeling that I'm not the only one who has the occasional grumpy day (or week....or two weeks...). Just maybe other women struggle with out of control emotions that make them seem like a crazy person from time to time. Maybe? Anyone?
While I would love to blame my hormones, my family, and that pesky dirty laundry for all my troubles, I know that the real problem is my heart. It always is. At church this week, God used His Word to convict and correct me.
I often struggle with having contentment right where I am. I long for a world without sin. I want a life where everyone loves me perfectly. I want the kids to obey, the dishes not to pile up, and the laundry to fold itself. I want things to be easy. I want a life God did not give to me. Of course, I don't want a different husband or kids, I just want my circumstances of the moment to be different.
And then God says, "Only let each person lead the life that the Lord has assigned to him, and to which God has called him..." (1 Corinthians 7:17). He goes on to talk to those who are slaves. SLAVES. He tells those who are in the worst situations possible that they have freedom through Him and that they should live their lives fully right where He has placed them, whether they are slaves or freemen.
Do I believe that God has placed me where I am? Do I believe that the Lord has a sovereign plan and purpose in every situation? Do I believe it when the children are arguing? How about when the house looks like it's been ransacked? When everything feels like it's falling apart? I'd like to say that I believe it. As a matter of fact, if you asked, I probably would say that I believe it. But my actions and attitudes tell a different story.
I ignore the Truth. I get caught up in me and forget about Him. I think that if God would simply change my circumstances or the people around me, then I could glorify Him by living fully where I am. Then everything would be better. But like my pastor reminded us, we have Jesus. Things can't get better than that!
"So, brothers, in whatever condition each was called, let him remain with God." (1 Corinthians 7:24)
I have Jesus. Right here, right now. In the middle of the piles of laundry and homeschool lessons and dusty furniture, I have Jesus. When the people I love make loving hard, I have Jesus. During those moments when everything seems all messed up and it feels like God has left me alone, I have Jesus. Whether I believe it or not, I have Jesus.
I have Jesus, and it doesn't get any better than that.
This post is linked to Raising Homemakers.
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March 12, 2012 - 4:26 pm
Thank you! I agree with the point that my words would agree but my actions and attitudes tell a different story. Oh how I thank God for Sundays! Great preaching to keep me on the “straight path”…and thank you for the encouragement today
March 13, 2012 - 9:39 am
You just described my weekend. Rest assured, you are not the only one who feels this way, far from it. I work full time (out of necessity) and have two teenage boys. I’ve been married to a wonderful man for 20 years. I constantly feel like I fail them all the time. I am grateful for my job, but it is very people oriented and I tend to give “myself” to every situation. By the time I get home, you guessed it, there’s not much left of me. I’m spent. My house is a mess, I am easily overwhelmed. When I get caught up in the problems of my job (house), there is no reward. But when I remember my God, everything makes sense. Although what I do has importance in this world, it really doesn’t matter much to God. What matters to God is that I have a relationship with Him, period. That is when my “self importance” washes away, I realize I can only do my best, and life becomes simple again. My house may be a mess, but I have two awesome, straight A, polite, loving teenage boys. I may be overwhelmed, but I have a husband who stays by my side through it all. God is so good and I am so blessed. My biggest struggle is to remember this on a daily basis. Thank you so much for what you said, it is so helpful when people bare all and you know that you are not alone.
March 14, 2012 - 11:43 am
Thank you so much for being real and saying out loud what many of us feel inside. You encouraged me today. I too have been meditating much on the passage you mentioned in 1 Cor. May you be a blessing to your family this day as you serve them and more importantly our Saviour.
March 21, 2012 - 4:32 pm
Thank you for this reminder. I think as a wife and mom it is easy to get overwhelmed at times. It is also easy to forget that we are all here for God’s greater glory. Through Christ we are able to do all we need. All we need to do is trust.
March 21, 2012 - 10:37 pm
Yes, I’ve been in that place, too, and it is almost always a heart issue. Praise God He is the master heart doctor and does a work on us when we are willing for a check up. Keep turning to Him. It is totally worth it!
March 28, 2012 - 11:26 am
This is so on point.I am feeling overwhelmed right about now and i must admit i do want things to be easy and contentment is the issue.I have two kids and i don’t have no routine so there is no aim or direction.I used to be very structured but when i had my 2nd child i wasn’t able to maintain my structured and predictable ways.
March 28, 2012 - 3:43 pm
Adding another kiddo to love and to care for can certainly do a number on our schedules and routines! It might seem impossible to have totally structured days right now, but maybe you can add in some routines that will fit the season of life you’re in. Start by taking time with the Lord each morning. Even if it’s just a verse jotted down on an index card to read while you’re making breakfast, let His Word wash over your day. Pray to Him while you’re changing diapers or building blocks. Lean on Him.
Then, try jotting down a very basic morning routine to accomplish (limit it to three or four things). If I had to pick four things, I would (1) shower and dress, (2) make the bed, (3) clean up breakfast dishes, (4) start a load of laundry. Those things might take me most of the day, but at least I would feel a little better when they were finally done. If you are able to get your morning tasks done by afternoon nap time, add a simple afternoon routine, such as (1) clean up lunch dishes, (2) switch laundry to the dryer, (3) start making dinner. Start small! A little bit of change and improvement adds up over time.
Remember that God has placed you where you are because He loves you. He has blessed you with children to care for because He loves you. Love and enjoy your kids. Love and enjoy your husband. Draw near to God while you are going through these tough times. “The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” (Lamentations 3:22-23)
March 28, 2012 - 5:28 pm
Thank you so much for your encouragement.:)
March 5, 2013 - 11:09 pm
While I would love to blame my hormones, my family, and that pesky dirty laundry for all my troubles, I know that the real problem is my heart. It always is. – YES!
I often struggle with having contentment right where I am. I long for a world without sin. I want a life where everyone loves me perfectly. I want the kids to obey, the dishes not to pile up, and the laundry to fold itself. I want things to be easy. I want a life God did not give to me. Of course, I don’t want a different husband or kids, I just want my circumstances of the moment to be different.- YES!
I’d like to say that I believe it. As a matter of fact, if you asked, I probably would say that I believe it. But my actions and attitudes tell a different story. – YES!
I have Jesus. Right here, right now. – PRAISE THE LORD!
May 14, 2013 - 2:17 pm
I had a great Mom’s Day, then had issues with my son.I just have heavy heart, and I’m asking the Lord to help me shake it and go forward despite my emotions, I think I just need to take a break also, send us Your Living Water Lord to draw from, amen, Carolyn