This summer hasn't gone according to plan. There was so much to do, so many places to go, and so much fun to have. But, with Mackenzie being sick much of the time, this summer is quickly turning into "the one that got away". Then, last week, my summer took another unplanned turn. Actually, my life took an unplanned turn. Last Monday night, as I was going to bed, I got the call that I knew would come one day. I just never expected "one day" to arrive. At least not so soon.
Late Monday night, my dad passed away. He joined his Savior and is experiencing the full glory of God. I can't be sad for him. But I am very sad for me and my family. My dad wasn't simply my children's grandpa, he was their friend. And he wasn't simply my father, he was my daddy. I can't begin to measure how much he will be missed. Right now, with all of the travel and service planning, it seems a bit unreal, yet I know that the reality will soon set in for us all.
But I also know that God is good. Sometimes I struggle to believe it, but I know it. And I'm sure my dad knew it, too. He told me often. Now he understands the fullness of what that means. So, while I am experiencing a joyful sadness, he is experiencing nothing but pure Joy. God is good.
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August 5, 2010 - 6:10 pm
I know from personal experience that the precious Holy Spirit will comfort you at this time. I often wonder how people who don’t know the Lord personally make it through this type of loss. You know your Daddy is with his Lord, and when it gets right down to it, that’s what living for Christ is all about, eternal reward. May God richly bless you and your family.
October 15, 2010 - 3:40 pm
I know this reply is a bit late, so I hope your grief is subsiding. I don’t know how long it is suppose to continue, but sometimes it feels like forever. My mom and dad passed away this year. You would think that meant together (they were divorced). They both died of cancer (two different types); mom in Feb. dad in July. I have a sadness that is lingering. I know God is with me or I would not be able to cope with every day living. He is so gracious to have given us our parents for such a long time (well, I’m 48), and I am thankful for every minute I had with them. He picked out two perfect parents for me. I’m sure you feel the same way about your dad. Any way, my thoughts and prayers are with you.
This is the first time I’ve visited your site. I can’t believe I’ve unloaded my feelings. Thanks for listening.
October 15, 2010 - 4:35 pm
It might seem late to you, but today was perfect timing! I am so sorry to hear that you lost both of your parents. I cannot imagine your sorrow. I don’t know how long the sadness will last. I wish I did. I feel like most days are getting easier for me, and I’m often struck by the goodness of God in the timing and events surrounding my dad’s death. But then, all of a sudden, I’ll have a day when the waves seem to crash down on me. A day like today. Sometimes these moments can be brought on by by a song I hear, a memory that comes to mind, or an event I’d like to call and share with him. Other times, the tears are brought on by my own self pity. I’m afraid that’s what happened today. Something (usually unrelated) gets me started, and before long I’m dwelling on how “unfair” it is that my dad is gone. It isn’t pretty! But God, in His mercy, always draws me back to Himself.
Thank you for “unloading” your feelings. I know that the sadness can seem so deep and so overwhelming. I also know that God has designed this suffering for our good and His glory. I don’t understand it. I don’t exactly like it. But I know it’s true. I pray that God will encourage your heart today!
February 21, 2011 - 10:34 pm
Thank you for your comment on my blog. And I am so sorry that you lost your father. My loss does not compare but I can relate to the sadness that comes from deep within. A friend commented and said “it offends every part of us, but hopefully points us to Jesus.” And I am so thankful that your hope remains in Him and that you trust in His goodness and grace even though it doesn’t make sense. Thank you again for the encouraging words and for honoring God through your suffering.